GooseTales

Nearing Completion

Well, I've finished up 3 exams so far this semester and have one left to go.  That means that I'm one three hour exam away from completing my first year of law school.  All in all, it's been a rewarding experience.  Sure, the cases about dog bits, breaking damns, knifemakers, the Trident building, exploding packages, trains, etc, get old, but it wasn't that bad.  Beyond that, I've made some great friends.  It's funny, despite the things that have gone wrong in the last year, I have to say the last two, overall have been a hell of a success.

Professionally: I found a new job when I needed to and it paid more than I was making.  Less than three months later, I was hired away with a nice bump in salary and more time off for school.  Since then I've been approached about another job with another bump in salary, but had to pass.

Academically:  After having decided I would try to go to law school three years ago and being rejected by the only school I applied to.  Last year, I applied to another local school on a whim at the deadline, and through a little extra work managed to get accepted.  I posted a GPA higher than anytime since high school in the first semester, placing me near the top of my class (also for the first time since high school).  I applied for transfer after an agonizing decision process and have now been accepted to the law school that rejected me the first time.

Personally: Well, we all know that it hasn't been perfect here.  Despite the one glaring downpoint, all-in-all, it's pretty damn good.  I've made more close friends in the one year of law school than I did in four years of college.  They've been great for studying, hanging out with, debating things, and were a source of support and strength when I needed it.  My health is so much better than it was.  I look a lot better and feel a lot better than I did in the past.  Consequently, in the last six months I've been on dates with more women than in the previous 27 years of my life.  Now, none of those have worked out, but I'm not worried about that right now.  Plenty of time for serious relationships.  Of course, if you know any single women... don't hesitate to send them my way.

So, it's had its ups and downs, but who am I kidding?  I'm happier than I've been in a long time.  So, I'll just keep moving forward, enjoying life, having fun, studying hard, and hopefully making my life a success.

Love Lost

So, I was looking for something in some files tonight and it was something I hadn't seen in awhile, so I opened a box looking for it.  I didn't find what I was looking for, but I did find another load of memories.  It's amazing the things you keep over the course of a relationship... cards, letters, notes, trinkets, etc.  When I found them, I was struck reading them all, I couldn't stop myself.  I read through them for over 40 minutes.  I expected a lot of pain, but I only found a little.  I'm making progress, I guess. 

It has been over six months now.  I've been on dates, but to be honest, I haven't felt anything with any of them.  I find myself wondering if my heart is just too scarred right now to love someone new and find that joy again.  I wonder if it's just a matter of finding the right person that will open up my heart to someone new.  I don't know.  It's probably some combination of both. 

Back to the box, reading through all of those cards, letters, and notes was a trip down memory lane.  I could remember the little things that had inspired them.  The little bumps in the road, the challenges we faced, etc.  I also read through a bound book she gave me for my birthday.  She had organized in printed all of our emails from the first three or so months of our relationship and bound them.  Our song was on the inside cover.  I read through the emails (about 35 pages, we were quite prolific).  I was struck by how immature some of the emails struck me.  On both of our parts, we seemed completely caught up in the romance of our relationship.  I'm torn in I don't know if our love really was immature (it was by far our most serious and intense relationship) or if it was something else.  Was our love that amazing that those statements of never-ending love (ha!), need, want, desire, etc, were reasonable?  Would I fall as hard and as completely today?  I doubt it, I've been jaded now and don't know that I'm capable of that type of love.

One thing is clear, I certainly put my all into the relationship.  The emails I wrote are often so amazingly over-the-top romantic... they still strike me as amazing and heartfelt, if somewhat immature.  I don't know, I'm clearly not an objective observer.  Who knows why we do the things in our relationships?  Especially, how do we know that in retrospect? Would we do that differently now?  Did we learn from our experiences? 

Overall, one thing I said many times in the emails still rings true to me.  I will forever be different for the experiences we shared.  I will live the rest of my life knowing the depth that love can reach.  My life will forever be richer for that experience, regardless of how it ended.  I will always think fondly of the time we shared.  Everyone should be so lucky as to experience what I once had.

I'm a terrible blogger...

I've been busy at work, but that's really no excuse.  School's been out for a week and I haven't posted anything to the blog.  It's not that I didn't have things to say, I did.  I just never got around to it.  I admit, I'm a failure.  Sue me.  For what, I'm not sure.  I guess I haven't got that far in law school.

In the meantime, I stumbled across these lyrics tonight.  I'm glad I didn't find these 5 months ago... they might have driven me over the edge.  None the less, the do sum up pretty completely exactly how one (or at least I) feels in that situation.  So to me, you, and all the others who will go through it in the future...

Goodbye My Lover by James Blunt (lyrics after the jump)

A First!

For the first time in recorded history, I have done my laundry and had no single socks left over.  This is a true accomplishment.  I always end up with an unmatched sock at some point, it's like an unwritten rule.  Yet, somehow, I've managed to achieve the impossible tonight and wash several pairs of socks and they've all come home with a mate.

Memories

Memories.  They really are amazing little things. They can lift you up, right out of the place where you are and like a magical time machine, transport you into someplace else at some other time.  All it takes is a sight, a sound, or scent.  Sometimes they pick you up and take you back to the happier carefree days of youth, when you would swing on the swing set and listen to the sound of wind chimes.  That sound still brings me back to my time growing up when I would hear the wind rustle through them, making them sing from the porch, as I played without a care in the world.  It's not often as adults that we have the opportunity to live so free from the realities of the world around us, but memories have the power to free us.

Still, at times, the memories bring back thoughts that might better be forgotten.  Yesterday, I drove through a neighborhood that I used to see everyday, but now rarely.  I took the same route from my apartment that I took very nearly every day for over a year.  The memories didn't flood back over me until I made the left turn that took me away from the other places that I take the route too.  I could have gone this way dozens of times in the last four months to get here or there, but I avoided it.  Last night, I was sure that it would mean nothing to me.  I was wrong.

Seeing those familiar places... the market, the Starbucks, the Cold Stone, the Baskin Robbins, the McDonald's, the restaurant, the pizza place.  It all brought back a thousand memories.  They are powerful things; they break down the walls that you build inside of yourself and expose you to the raw emotion that you've moved past in your daily life.  They remind you of a time when all seemed right in the world and nothing could take you from what you were sure was your destiny.  They put you right back into that place and let you see just how wrong you were about things.  Of course, the memories are mostly happy: the late night walks to Starbucks holding hands, the walk back and forth on a warm day for the shared Apple Pie a la Mode (with Sinless Sweet Cream, of course), the stolen kiss waiting for the light to change.

Those places become forever a part of who you are and part of the fabric of your very being.  From now until I die, those places will always be associated with those times, those moments, those memories.  Though I have moved on and placed it behind me, I cannot deny that a song on the radio, a sight in the city, or the scent of a certain perfume brings me back to a time before.  Now, I just look out on the world and search out someone new to make more memories that will last a lifetime.

Ahhhhh

Sometimes, the ability to sleep in, if only for a couple hours, is such a simple pleasure.  Thank you George and Abe.  Happy President's Day, especially to my friends in DC who have to be at work today while I'm still at home.

I'll be Going to Work...

Well, it looks I'll be going to work on Monday Tuesday.  Sadly, I did not win the $365 million Powerball jackpot last night.  In fact, I bought two tickets and only managed one number between the two of them.  Of course, for Wednesday's $340 million, I didn't get one number.  So, I'm improving.  It looks like one winning ticket was sold in Lincoln, NE. At least I still have Monday off.

Of course, my loss is not my loss alone.  Maryland lost about $8.4 million and Montgomery County lost $5.67 million.  I'm sure good old Dougie Duncan could have found plenty of uses for an extra $5.67 million.

I Love Self-Check

I just got back from my weekly trip to the friendly neighborhood Giant.  Sometimes I go to Safeway, I really wish Giant would start carrying these and then I wouldn't need to run over to Safeway.  So, anyway, I love the self-check registers.  I don't know if I'm faster than the checkers, but it certainly feels like I am.  It could just be that I'm doing something instead of standing there, absentmindedly chatting with a checker, wondering when I'm going to be done, but it feels faster nonetheless and that's what's important.  I mean no offense to checkers, but sometimes they take forever.  Even on their worst days they're still three times faster than someone working at the Maryland MVA, who themselves (I've been told) are three times faster than those working at the DC DMV.  Now, seriously, you'd think MD and the District could at least require people to know how to type to do those jobs, is that so much to ask?

Back to the self-check.  The technology has vastly improved since I first used one.  I was in Baltimore probably 5 or 6 years ago and used one at a SuperFresh.  I think that SuperFresh may still have the same machines, but they were practically impossible to use.  You could only check-out if you had a limited number of items, in part, because you had to place items on a scale in the bagging are to verify the weight was what it should be.  Now, you just put the items on the belt, they go through a little tunnel, get weighed on the belt, and then you bag.  There's no need to bag and move items, being careful to keep them on the scale, and then bag new stuff.

I always wonder if the workers secretly despise those of us using self-check.  Do they think we're trying to push them out of a job?  If I was a career checker it would worry me.  It seems as more and more people are more and more comfortable with the technology it becomes a bigger risk.  Now, the Giant has moved toward having employees bag your groceries as you check out.  That's a great service and it makes it easier, since the storage area at the end of the belt is not that big and sometimes fills, requiring you to go bag before you can check more if you buy a lot of stuff.  It'll be interesting to see where we are in 5 years.

Correction and Surprise

Ok, imagine my surprise when I get home from hanging out with some friends tonight to celebrate someone else's birthday.  I get back from Adams Morgan, get into the apartment, fire up the laptop, and find out my blog traffic spiked big time this evening.  So, I go to see what's going on and find out that Slate has linked to my blog.  Now, seeing as I have two serious blogs in my past (neither one of which went anywhere) and here I am posting a completely non-serious (well, mostly) blog and on my second day I get linked to by Slate.  Completely unbelievable. 

CORRECTION TO THE SLATE STORY:  I am not a DC Lawyer.  God knows, I wish I was I could spend with a lot more abandon.  Sadly, I am but a lowly part-time law student.  I do work full time.  All of this was covered in my initial post.  I just don't want anyone to be misled.

Another confession and some funnies...

Ok, here's the deal... my job is pretty serious.  So, I like to have a little fun in the mornings and on my Metro ride in, I like to read the comics first.  I know, it's terrible.  My ride in is just perfect for getting through the comics, reading my favorite Post column, and then jumping to the editorial page.  So, if you see me on the red line with the comics open, don't assume I'm a simpleton or not intellectually curious or not engaged, I am.  I'm just taking a respite.  Also, feel free to say hi!

So, in the comics this morning... a shocking revelation in the normally very tame story of a boy and his dog... Red and Rover.  (Make sure to look at the Feb. 17 panels.)  Two of my favorite strips appear together: Foxtrot includes some characters from Pearls Before Swine.  Another favorite is Get Fuzzy.  Get Fuzzy, and to a lesser extent PBS, is a strip that requires you to be a reader to see the humor.  Much of it is based on character development between Bucky and Satchel (who is, for my money, the best drawn comics character).